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what does everyone else like about you that you'd change?


9 replies to this topic

#1
AmiDenise

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so, i have long hair -- down below the bottom of my bra in the back. it drives me abso-freaking-lutely nuts. for months, i've wanted to cut it off above my shoulders. but, every time i mention wanting to cut my hair to anyone -- even complete strangers i just happen to be talking to -- the response is the same, "your hair is so beautiful. don't cut it."

i go through this every time i grow it out. it drives me nuts; everyone else raves over it. i deal with it until i can't take it any more. then i cut it. then, until i let it grow out again, i have to deal with the comments of "the new hair style is cute, but your hair is so gorgeous when it's long. when are you gonna grow it out again?"

i've even had people tell me that shorter hair isn't "me" -- despite the fact that i feel more comfortable with shorter hair. my hubby says that shorter hair makes me look butch -- not surprising too me as i am a little butch. femme looking, butch acting. you know the drill.

i'm currently in the phase of trying to be patient and make sure that the jones to cut the hair isn't just a "phase". or, maybe i'm just trying to convince myself that everyone else is right and hoping that i'll see what they see in my hair.

anyway... i was just wondering if anyone else goes through this with anything, doesn't have to be hair, and how they handle it. is there something about you that everyone else loves and you wish wasn't there or you could change? how did you handle it?

i know that in a month -- maybe less -- i'll have had enough of pulling my hair back all the time and cut it off again, ignoring what everyone else says. for now, everyone can just enjoy my hair. i'll enjoy it soon enough.
:wink:
One should no more deplore homosexuality than left-handedness. ~Towards a Quaker View of Sex, 1964

(As a left-handed lesbian, I'm particularly fond of this quote.)

#2
blacklesbian

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The fact that I am a lesbian is some shit that people wish that they could change...in Brooklyn apperence means nothing....

#3
Lise441

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My mother loves when I wear my hair natural, she thinks it's the best thing in the world, but I have always been resistant to doing so even though my fine hair cannot handle all the stress and torture I put it through. Before Yom Kippur last year she asked me to wear my hair natural so finally in October I did it and I love it and don't plan on resorting to my other methods.
Sometimes you stand on the edge of a cliff and you jump. You jump because you're tired of being scared. Sometimes you jump just to feel the fall

#4
monteen

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I have the same problem with my hair. If I spend lots of time with it, I can maybe get my long hair to look good. I'm pretty femme, but I'd rather spend that extra hour every morning sleeping. I started cutting my hair short three years ago, and I love it. I feel confident and sexy. I feel more feminine with short hair. The nickname I got when I had long hair was Barbie Doll, now I get naughty librarian.

However, to hear every one else, I never looked worse! Whenever I'm home for the holidays, family and family friends complain about my short hair and how much better my long hair looked. My ex boyfriend said I looked too butch (I was still in the closet then, but I doubt you really want to hear my opinions on men who say such hurtful things). I even have to fight hair stylists to cut my hair as short as I want it.

Point is, it's your hair, your body, your self image. Ignore (or ditch) those who can't respect that. If a lover complains, remind them that it makes you feel sexy, and you have proof that they like it when you feel sexy *winkwink*. And if it really bothers them, offer to wear extensions every once in a while (at their expense of course).

#5
BauboBBW

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#1 - my nose:

:( i can't stand it....i think it's too wide and pudgy. i've always felt that it prevented me from getting dates....along with:

#2 - my skin tone:

:( i'm kinda a milk chocolate tone....and in my community....er....let's just say that chocolate, while it's applauded...usually isn't chosen when it comes to dating......my observation y'all....just sayin'....

and, no i'm not gonna do a "wacko jacko".... i ain't THAT jacked up to change my skin color via a caustic chemical peel!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Don't compromise yourself, you're all you've got..." - Janis Joplin

#6
BRENNIVINCHICK27

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THING'S PEOPLE WANT ME TO CHANGE IS EVERY MY HAIR GET'S LONG I USUALLY FOR SOME REASON CUT IT THERE ALWAYS LIKE UR HAIRS SO PRETTY LEAVE IT ALONE BLAHH TO THAT LOL ITS MY HAIR MY LIFE
AND I'D CHANGE THIS ABOUT MYSELF WHEN I GET STRESSES I FREAK OUT SO I'VE BEEN TRYING TO BE ZEN LATELY LOL ACTUALLY ITS KINDA WORKING
*If The Only Possible Way We Can Be Together Is In My Dreams..Then I'll Sleep Forever*

#7
phoenix99

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The three things that every last person I have dated... "you have nice eyes," "I like your dimples," and "you have such a cute little nose!"

Not kidding, every last person has those three things to say, i don't know why.

But anyway, I like my nose, but it is rather small and it could be a tad larger. To actually fit my face.
------------------------------------
But he that dares not grasp the thorn
Should never crave the rose.
- Anne Bronte, "The Narrow Way"

#8
Guest_atom_*

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It makes me so mad when people bitch about other people's hair.

I wanted to cut my hair short since I was a kid. My mom (Texan born and raised) didn't want me to because "ladies have long hair." Boyfriends wouldn't want me to because they "wouldn't be attracted" to me, I'd "look like a boy," etc etc homophobic closet insecurity-driven bullshit.

I even had hairstylists tell me they WOULD NOT cut my hair short unless it had been at least 6 months since I had broken up with someone, since girls "always want to cut their hair post-break-up."


So I went and bought an electric razor and did it myself.

#9
kwall

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everyone loves my hazel/green eyes...and i've always felt blue eyes would suit me better.
:D

#10
allyfey

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My nose. It has this little bump that just drives me crazy.





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