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Fag Dyke


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#1
Cydistic

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A butch dyke who is into other butches... It took me a long time to realize that the whole butch/femme dance just didn't do it for me. Problem is that I'm almost a pariah now as a result. Butches are "supposed to" like femmes. I do... as friends. For partnership, I want another handsome butch, and I'm not just talking bro' and buddy. I like stocky butches and all that goes with that.

#2
Imsapphic

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I think I am slowly coming to the same conclusion. In the past I have been involved with fem women and it has been nothing but trouble now I find myself rethinking everything and realizing just where I should be looking, at the beautiful butch women that have been there all along.
Truth is within ourselves; it takes no rise from outward things, what'er you may believe. There is an inmost centre in us all, where truth abides in fullness.

#3
Cydistic

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For me it was like another coming out. Of course there have been detractors who tell me things like... "Oh, you just haven't met the right femme yet..." Sound familiar? Reminds me of the homophobes who tell me that I haven't met the right man... yadda, yadda, yadda.
Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try. - Yoda, The Empire Strikes Back

#4
Imsapphic

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I feel the same way and it shocks me the amount of prejudice there is in the homosexual community as if the roles hetro's play are the ones we are to play and the predudice that bi- sexual's incounter in the homo community as well as transgendered. P.s. I love starwars!
Truth is within ourselves; it takes no rise from outward things, what'er you may believe. There is an inmost centre in us all, where truth abides in fullness.

#5
Cydistic

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It does become problematic. If we emulate heterosexual roles, then we're disrespected one way; if we are butch on butch or femme on femme, we're disrespected another way; and, if transgender or bisexual enters into the equation at all, there's even more disrespect to come.

What's a dyke to do?
Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try. - Yoda, The Empire Strikes Back

#6
frozenillusion

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I just wanted to chip in and agree on the prejudice that exists within the community.

I am, I guess, on the other side of the scale. I am a "femme" (although, not extremely femme but what many call a hard femme (ie a femme who can change a tyre and do DIY, hehe)), and I am almost exclusively attracted to other femmes (but femmes like me, not extremely girly ones). I have been met with pretty much the same opinions you two cited, only the other way around. Butches usually seem to take for granted that I, being femme, will be receptive to them; and I find it quite hard actually to meet femmes who share my preference.
"Love feeleth no burden, thinketh nothing of labours, attempteth what is above its strength, pleadeth no excuse of impossibility; for it thinketh all things possible for itself and all things lawful." - Thomas A. Kempis

#7
Imsapphic

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my experince with the femme lesbians around these parts, they want other femme women at least these days and these are the ultra femme's that I am refering to which I find to be quite different then when I was first coming out in the 1980 And my older sister would tell me stories about back in the stonewall days when lesbians and gay men hated each other. I guess it is ever changing as is society, it was just in the 60's when it was illegal for interracial couples to marry so I do believe our day will come.
Truth is within ourselves; it takes no rise from outward things, what'er you may believe. There is an inmost centre in us all, where truth abides in fullness.

#8
Cydistic

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frozenillusion:

I had heard that the same situation existed for femmes, but, not being one, I didn't want to speak for anyone else. We all know that we're not the only one with these preferences. What do we do to meet others? Have you found that you have better luck meeting like-minded women in person or online?

You mentioned having butches assume that you'd be receptive to them. Know that one too. Many femmes assume that since I'm butch I'm going to be interested in them.

I think, though, the harder part is the actual disgust I sense from other butches when they learn of my preference. It's like they assume that since I'm into butches I'm automatically interested in them. That seems to me a lot like assuming that since I'm into women any woman will do. That is definitely not the case. The chemistry, etc. still has to be right.

Imsapphic:

Our day will definitely come. I just hope we will continue our activism until it gets here. It's easy to become disheartened when, in the US, one state after the next is enacting laws prohibiting gay marriage, while, in the rest of the world, one country after the next is enacting laws allowing it.

It's not that I want to get married, but knowing that we can means something.

Cydistic
Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try. - Yoda, The Empire Strikes Back

#9
Danielegrl

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I started out femme but have eve'volved to butch. To me its an attitude not a look. I am also coming around to being attracted to butch womyn, whereas in the past i thought i wanted a femme. Yes i transitioned / GID and got all hung up on the outer look when i started transitioning in the 90's etc but the real me has come out and when i went to the www.norcalwomensmusic.org festival two weeks ago i found myself ignoring anyone who looked femme. However, many of the butches don't see me as butch because of my look. However those who get to know me find my butch mentality appealing. I still haven't taken it to the next level of dating but at least i am sure of my internal self. I now know my formative years (as a runaway teen) living on a commune in southern humboldt county Calif. with many dyke / butch womyn has shown through. Today i leave the GID out of who i am (in real life) and i like it that way. I use to think i would end up with a femme TS but the last few years has allowed me to be the true me. I love old dykes.. I know many wouldn't like me if they knew my GID past but thats ok. I understand their feelings and i don't dislike them because of it. However, i don't like butch dykes who whisper things like (i want to bunny fuck you) in my ears. I am old fashioned and want someone to want me not for some kinky experience with a womyn (with a GID past). I want someone to want me for me. :)





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