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How do you start to talk with someone that you like?


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#11
Sonja

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Quote

Hi. I'm new here and I may need little help ladies....

So, initial attraction hasn't been that hard, luckily if I have liked someone I get this whole eye-to-eye thing for few seconds and I know the attraction has been reciprocated.

HOWEVER, I'm clueless as to what to do next, unless someone always makes the first move, I don't know how to...and it will be nice to be the first one to start a conversation or take the lead for once...

The problem is I don't know what to say...I don't want to be too obvious so I overthink the situation and eventually end up leaving and without saying anything, any help or advices please? How do you all initiate a conversation with someone you feel attracted to? How do you keep it casual? And finally, how do you flirt?

Thanks!!

Abee


Abee,

Try something casual. It may sound silly, but pay attention to what she is wearing and casually mention something like this. "I love those shoes, or shirt, ear rings any of it. Where did you get them or it?" Its a way to start a casual conversation and that little praising/compliment, that many on here are talking about. Don't be discouraged if that's the extent of the conversation the first time around. Keep working at it a lil each time. The idea is to slowly make her feel more comfortable, relaxed and a connection is slowly building. Also ask her about her interests, after the first conversation unless she continues talking to you. This way you opened the door, said something nice and made her feel good. The next move is up to her.

I hope this helps.

Sonja


#12
K8QP

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this topic really made me smile :) thanks guys....
I use to be very relaxed when approaching a girl and I had no problems having a conversation about all and nothing,but the last few years have been so weird for me... i have changed...i cant even think of going to someone ... Im somehow all afraid she may have a partner or im not her type and all possible things... :roll:

#13
Sonja

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Quote

this topic really made me smile :) thanks guys....
I use to be very relaxed when approaching a girl and I had no problems having a conversation about all and nothing,but the last few years have been so weird for me... i have changed...i cant even think of going to someone ... Im somehow all afraid she may have a partner or im not her type and all possible things... :roll:


Well, that is perfectly normal to feel that way. Even I do. I used to be able to walk up to anyone and know just what to say, now its different. My first thought is, well I know I'm a very weird person and many people get creeped out by weird people, especially those with a dark humor. But we just have got to keep at it and eventually, we will all meet someone that will like us as we are. :)

#14
misslovinu833

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Quote

Hi. I'm new here and I may need little help ladies....

So, initial attraction hasn't been that hard, luckily if I have liked someone I get this whole eye-to-eye thing for few seconds and I know the attraction has been reciprocated.

HOWEVER, I'm clueless as to what to do next, unless someone always makes the first move, I don't know how to...and it will be nice to be the first one to start a conversation or take the lead for once...

The problem is I don't know what to say...I don't want to be too obvious so I overthink the situation and eventually end up leaving and without saying anything, any help or advices please? How do you all initiate a conversation with someone you feel attracted to? How do you keep it casual? And finally, how do you flirt?

Thanks!!

Abee






Hi everybody! I'm new here...what I really really want is just to talk to someone my age so we can get to know each other and to clarify lots of doubts I have! Hehe :)

#15
illuminatedlove

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I have a bit of the same problem as well. I'm so shy and I suppose afraid of rejection that I end up leaving without saying anything, or worse, they leave before I get the courage to... which would still be never, but it still sucks that my opportunity leaves.

I try and compliment them on something about them after I've observed the way they interact with others as well as their body language.

About a week ago, I actually gave my number to the really cute girl. Turns out she was only slightly on the fence of being bi instead of straight, but she was really flattered and even though I was a bit bummed she never called, it still made me feel good that I mustered up the courage to do so. =)
"Because there's nothing more beautiful than the way the ocean refuses to stop kissing the shoreline, no matter how many times it's swept away". -Sarah Kay

#16
junebaby

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I am in the same place - I don't even know how to approach someone as I am just coming out. I have never been one to take the initiative and am afraid of "doing the wrong thing" . I am a great observer of people though and hope that with a bit of time I will be brave !! Sometimes we just have to take the chance and we may find everything we've ever wanted.

#17
AriesGirl

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I try to look into her eyes, you can tell a lot from her reaction. She won't break the stare if she is interested.

#18
Lizzy

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I have tried to send messages to womyn on here who I found interesting... and I don't even get a "not interested". Just dead silence. Makes it hard to try again. Why can't people at least be nice and realize what an effort it is to send the first tentative hello?

#19
ispeakjerseyshore

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If I like a girl I'm usually really shy in person, occasionally make eye contact with her but not too much I try and play it cool. I find it hard to just walk up to her and start talking unless she makes conversation then I respond. As I'm new to liking girls its different experience for me as guys use to approach me and I've never really been the dominant one to just approach someone
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#20
Linda

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It's always best to just be yourself and say hello! Nothing wrong with a nice smile when you ask how she's doin. Most people will respond by the energy you give off, so relax and breathe. When they see you smiling and relaxed being cool she'll feel that and usually copy you right back. Cuts tension like you wouldn't believe. If she's not interested she'll be kind enough to excuse herself but all is still good no hurt feelings, remember, you were just saying, "Hello"!







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