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Since noone else....

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I have many friends that are TG & have dated a FTM...{Female to Male}...No they did not have bottom surgery, but they are human, too....Gay women that date TG's are called Transensual femmes....

Many other TG boi's, daddi's, etc. also pack 24/7..So our Rainbow World is full of all kind of flavors....Not just ~nilla~

~Mmmmmm~ Are you butch from head to toe?


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I just have to say thank you, to the original poster, and to all the other people that posted on here, for understanding that who you are is not a physical thing, and people shouldn't be descriminated against just for trying to be who they know they are.

You all are awesome :)
But he that dares not grasp the thorn
Should never crave the rose.
- Anne Bronte, "The Narrow Way"


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Perhaps I am to blame as well. My own thoughts on this are confusing to myself. I am a in transition to female. I consider myself to be a pretty and soft femme. Transition is bringing great inner peace and joy. Now the Irony is that I long for a soft femme GG. I am not sure that if even I, who should know better, would "settle" for another TS. That is not written in stone as they say because the INNER person is really who I would wish to interact with and hopefully spend the rest of my life with. But I can't but notice the prejudice exists in myself and then why should I want to be accepted by a GG that may well have the same subtle feelings as I do.
I am intensely caring, compatssionate and creative. I am seeking a similar woman to complement me for a long lasting relationship. Maybe for life.


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I am not sure that if even I, who should know better, would "settle" for another TS.

This is a fairly sensitive issue for a lot of people I know, and every tgirl I know has a different attitude about it. A lot of them are shades of this, which to me speaks worlds about the way that we transfolk see ourselves. the question is begged "if we're not good enough to date each other, then how could we be good enough for others to date us? are we not many of us queer?"

personally, I absolutely adore the notion of dating a transguy. when I think about dating another transgirl, though, it bothers me for reasons I'm probably not all that proud of: while I can date a biogirl, a bioguy, or a transguy caring only for their character and chemistry with me, dating a transgirl just seems... gay. like I'd be dating myself.

which is not to say that I see a huge difference between biowomen and transwomen, because to do that would set me apart from biowomen in a way that I'm also not comfortable with. there's just enough difference so as to make me not want to date another transchick.

unless she were really hot with a great personality. viva exceptions!


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Gender and my search for my significant other in conflict. I met a woman who contacted me knowing I was in transition. Our first was on that basis but even though her family (excluding her father but including her four daughters and mother) accepted me. But there was a gradual shift in her thinking if she could live in a lesbian relationship as that would "define" her that way. I agonized within my self as I began to truly love her, if her just allowing me to cross dress but not live full time and not go for GRS would be right for me. It was a painful choice to turn the relationship into a platonic or spiritual relationship and move on with my plans to go all the way post op and seek a mate that would accept me as I truly was inside myself. Now I am in contact with a woman that is just fine with my transition but I am trying to put off a meeting till this spring when I plan my operations. I just do not want to be placed in a position of a meeting where I am not all that I will soon be and then going through such a drastic physical change and hope a new relationship survives that. I find that living "in transition" is both joyous and confusing and even painful at times. I just cannot wait for the time that I will be as close to a genetic woman as science will allow. Part of this need to resolve to issue once and for all involves wanting so very much to find a woman to share my life with that is at least as feminine or more so than I am.
I am intensely caring, compatssionate and creative. I am seeking a similar woman to complement me for a long lasting relationship. Maybe for life.


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Something we all seem to overlook from time to time is that gender is between the ears, while sex is between the legs.

I am a MTF transexual who has been on HRT (hormone replacement therapy) for almost three years. I find the fact that a "natural" female lesbian is willing to treat a transwoman lesbian as well as has been stated very encouraging indeed.

Even in my most masculine days, I was always more lesbian than anything else in my approach to women . I have been wondering if I would ever find a natural female lesbian to love and be loved by.

Thank you soooo much for brightening my life with your story.

By the way, I wonder if other lesbian sites aren't missing the boat when they say that a transitioning MTF is not a lesbian in a man's body, and a totally butch natural female is not a man in a woman's body.

Oh, well. We are what we are. And ouir mentality is what we become.


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This is a very interesting yet perilous issue--what a lot of people don't realize is that trans lesbians are likely more common than bi or straight trans for the simple fact of with and advanced distaste for one male body it makes sense that one would not like other male bodys as well.

My situation confuses me on a daily basis--I pass very well in in most situations. But-- I fit the profile of a physically and sexually abused lesbian. I have had horriD situations involving males and am attracted to males--but I am flat out scared of men. I have had nothing but hurt visited on me by then and even though I can fantasize about david duchovny I don't think it wise for me to date men. So I end up being lesbian--which I have always connected more to girls than men--men aren't attracted to me for anything other than the sexual near as I can gather--granted so are a lot of women...but...

I never feel I am be unlegitimate by going with the flow---but I don't see the point of announcing to everyone I meet that I'm trans----If I wish to court someone at all they will know---whether I have girl parts or male parts, because it is imortant that someone I will love knows that. But until I get to that first in person date---what I grew up as is my business and pretty much mine alone.

I am surprised at how many gay girls are open to t-girl relationships--it makes me happy because I feel a gay girl that will be involved with me will treat as female no matter what. I am bi-- but I'm not comfortable dating men especially because on top of my own issues---evrytime I have done even the most remotely sexual thing with a man I get very bad flashbacks. I do not know if this is something that can change--but I would have to move very slow in any male relationship and cosider if it would be fair to that man if I flashbacked everytime we were intimate. And honestly---even now I still get more women interested in me than men Lesbotronic is the only lesbian dating site where I have been able to put my m2f status on my profile. It makes me more comfortable because for online stuff I would rather them know ahead of time--it makes everything easier. If I meet someone at a bar and we connect I can tell them at a first date---e-mails, phone calls etc...I'd rather them know off the bat because I can also respect someone that, although being comfortable with a trans maybe not being able to date one:) I also agree with the previous poster that I have always been very lesbian in my approach to women... And I talk too much so--- Hooray for Lesbotronic and shit.


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Wow o_O I know this is an old old thread, but the first post was pretty.. shocking to me. Thanks for that!
Vivas Esperanto


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i just wanted to say that reading about transgender/transsexual issues here has really opened my eyes.
i am 100% lesbian-and female at birth or whatever...but-wow.
i admit i am not sure if i could date anyone who is not ..(?) ..oh..i don't know..
what am i saying?
this is why reading this is good.
i wish somehow this could be seen by more people.
i know there is a lot of info out in the world if one looks..but..well..this is the first time i really delved further than "i have heard of that" type thoughts.
i am a newcomer here-and did delete my profile (i am just not ready for dating i guess..or-really: online stuff tends to make me too self-conscious...(tho it is good too..)(just the "dating" part is too much for me i guess...right now)..i know: who cares!!!? :)
anyway: i am-however-glad to have found this forum.
this particular topic has really made me think...and..it just sort of made my day.
(sorry if this is all scattered..i don't want to "edit" it all-as that somehow "ruins" it..
"anyway"-once again: i am glad to be here-and even tho i tend to be more of a reader than poster..well..it doesn't really matter does it?
it is just cool that there are places out there where people can actually speak w/o fear.


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I don't know if this is a hotbutton issue, but there are people like myself who only identify as female and not trans. I was in tersexed and grew up being told I was male. I was not reised as such and there are quite a few female aspects of my childhood upbringing. What some people don't realize, and I'm sure this is true for transmen in this situation as well.... Once someone walks though the door--they're on the other side, their sexuality, their demeanor, everything. I had a girl I was dating and she said that basically we can't ever be together because her parents will disown her if she is a lesbian. I tried to argue the point and get around it, due to my trans status and my history and realized I couldn't. It is some of the worst pain I have ever dealt with. And I realize... I can't go back. I am a girl from top to bottom, as much as situations like this pain me. It's not that I want to go back, it's just this thought came up. I am in horrid pain right now. It's funny---when I came out, I went from bisexual to lesbian. I have always seen woman in a lesbian manner, but it has gotten very different with how I look at women, its completely different than before. Icant say anyone else experience is like mine, but I have never wanted to be a t activist--and after losing somebody I love due to bigotry I am going to be a lot more active in the lesbian community, even though I already am fairly active. I want us as a gay community to be accepted, I want everyone to be able to be happy and no one to fear discrimination or loneliness just because the way they were born. Ok I'm done with my rant.

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