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"Check-In" from the Fat or Size-Positive Lesbians

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I am a big women. I always have been and always will be. For me I dont have a specific type... I mean I have preferances but nothing is written in stone. The wimin I date vary in size and style. One womyn was my size only shorter ( I am 5'7'') and had long straight hair, another was about 5'1'' and probably 100 lbs soaking wet, but she had tattoes all over and a shaved head. Another one was taller then me and pretty muscular...

I just wish more ppl were open minded, it would make this tuff lonely road more manageble.


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i'm a big girl.
i wasn't always as big, i was a size 11 just a few years ago, but i dated a man who was... just about the shallowest person i've ever met, and he overfed me so i'd get fat and "other guys wouldn't want me". man did that backfire, when i dumped him ALL his friends asked me out....
but anyway.
i'm now a size 16. not that big, but bigger than is "socially acceptable". i don't enjoy it, particularily because of my ridiculously large breasts. it's darned hard on my back, and i don't think it looks that nice. however i've accepted it, and i like myself better now than i EVER did before. mostly because of who i'm dating now, and my friends now.
in terms of attraction:
i like girls with some curve. superskinny looks... unhealthy, like you touch them and they break. however, personality far overrides physical looks.



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I used to have the same problem you have with your back hurting from large breast. My problem began when I was in HS and my pediatrician told me I could have breast reduction surgery but I had to wait until I was 18. So I waited and found the perfect plastic surgeon and during my winter break of 2002 I had my surgery and everything went well. My scars have vanished and he gave me the perfect cup size. My surgeon told me that he usually charges $2500 for the surgery but since I had back problems my insurance covered 100%. Maybe thats something you should look into, it will help and in the long run you will be grateful you did so.
Sometimes you stand on the edge of a cliff and you jump. You jump because you're tired of being scared. Sometimes you jump just to feel the fall


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ummm why is everyone so prejudice against the thin people who live healthy lifestyles and exersise? thats not fair. I'm a size 5 because I eat healthy and I exercise regularly. I do not do it because the media says so, I do it for myself to be healthy. I can't understand why people want to destroy their bodies and shorten their life span by eating things like McDonalds 5-7 days a week.

Now hold on Before anyone Spazzes at me for being "shallow" I was overweight before, My father had a heart attack because of his lazy lifestyle and eating habits. Sure I have overweight friends, because if I wasn't shallow then they wouldn't be my friends. But considering allot of a relationship has to do with what you and your partner value and what kinds of interests you have, then I need to be with someone who is going to share my values. I'm not butch but I love exercise such as swimming running and walking my dog. Skiing is fun too. I love to travel and walk around museums and foreign cities. I need someone who will be able to keep up with me. Someone who can have as much of a good time as I do doing the things we love.

I find that people cast off others as being shallow without even knowing them, either through jealousy or bad past experiences. Which is very unfair. For example there was a girl I knew who I thought was nice but she thought I might be shallow because my friends were "typical beautiful people". she was scared to hang out with us because she felt that she might not be accepted because of her weight, however they proved her wrong quite quickly. after the ice was broken she started to spend allot more time with us doing allot of the things we do and thus lost weight. it was not her intention to loose weight to "fit in" it happened because her lifestyle changed into one more like ours with more trips to the pool and the track. she gained no vanity did not become shallow at least to my knowledge.

So what I'm trying to say is it's not fair to bash or hate on people just because they decide to live a different lifestyle then yours and reap certain rewards because of their choices and or actions. I mean we are already victims of prejudice because of our sexuality, so why must it continue in our community.


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I'm not exactly what you would call 'thin' but i'm not exactly overweight either so i'm sort of inbetween. I'm trying to lose weight though for health purposes cause my mom is overweight and has diabetes and i am very susceptible to that myself if i don't lose weight and start changing my eating habits now.

But i don't have any prejudism at all. I like women all shapes and sizes, it just depends on the soul of the person to me.
When life gives you lemons make lemonade.


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i myself am not small, and i like women who have curves- all those skeleton models and actresses need to be taken into a krispy kreme
i basically apply the same rule to myself as i do to others: if you eat well and try to work out, you'll be okay. :D


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I'm short 'n buxom. :lol:
The only approval of our sizes we should be more concerned with is our own. I personally find several different body shapes of varying weight attractive. How people carry themselves matters a lot in my opinion.


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thanx for your replies, as i haven't logged in for awhile and was pleased to see the various comments upon returning.... :D

uh....just because someone is large (whatever your definition of large is), does not mean that they don't enjoy a "healthy lifestyle".... :roll:

i'm sorry to hear of your father's passing, but not everyone is lazy or has bad eating habits (your words, not mine)...i will agree that the double arches = death on a plate (or in a wrapper)...who knows where that crap comes from anyway....

i happen to be a vegetarian and i do enjoy yoga, pilates and tribal bellydancing classes on a weekly basis....so to automatically assume that a large person may not enjoy or does not enjoy being active is just following along with the commonplace stereotype about fat/overweight/ plus-size/large individuals....in fact, i know so-called "skinny" people who are complete couch-potatoes...

...and lots of times, large people who want to "get fit" feel intimidated or become easily discouraged when entering a gym or attempting any possibly public display (jogging, power walking, etc.) of excercise/activity due to public criticism and/or lambasting.

i also like museums, cultural street festivals and just generally wandering around my city (or another)....all of which include a good amount of what? walking.....that's what..... :wink:

and, no Versace_Raver, i am not spazzing on you....

BTW, what do you mean by "reap certain rewards"... from what? looking a certain way or participating in sports or sports-like activities? both have "certain rewards" that come with the dinner y'know.... 8)

i personally say, more power to ya....i'm not bashing on or "hating" on anyone who is sporty or enjoys participating in sporty-type stuff, just trying to put my finger on the pulse of this particular community. :)
"Don't compromise yourself, you're all you've got..." - Janis Joplin


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*If The Only Possible Way We Can Be Together Is In My Dreams..Then I'll Sleep Forever*

Sailor Fisheye

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My last girlfriend was really overweight--as in, to the point it audibly strained her breathing--and I'll admit, I didn't find that overweight to be attractive. I did not, however, find it genuinely repulsive... Indeed, I found her to be an excellent kisser.

On the other end of the stick (no pun intended), I don't really like stick figures, either. Real women have curves. Granted, like all things, there's eventually a point at which too much is unattractive (and just plain not healthy). But I'd rather have a woman with some meat on her bones. I really, really don't appreciate this hatred of body fat going around. 14-21% of one's weight being body fat is healthy.

I'm big in ways that don't have anything to do with body fat--specifically, while I weigh around 260 pounds now, my dietician actually estimated that my healthy weight would be between 200 and 225 pounds. I'm only six feet tall, and she wasn't using male standards or anything--that's just my frame. Chances are, I'm always going to be wearing size 16, 18, 20 clothes just because of my skeleton.

I'm still losing weight. To be truthful, I don't like being overweight, and I know it isn't healthy. Some six or eight months ago, I weighed 310 pounds, and I felt it. Since slimming down, it's gotten so much easier even to move (oh my god, I can kick! I can RUN!). Not to mention what it's sparing me in medical risks, especially given I'm taking estrogen (being trans and all). I even feel more attractive. But I don't have any desire to be underweight--I just want to shake the spare tire, the love handles, you know. :)

So no. I don't think women with bodies of a healthy weight are unattractive. In fact, I like my women chunky! Give her some bigger bones, some more muscle, and some healthy body fat (or, perhaps, even a little more than she really ought to have). Being too overweight, however, I do find unattractive--and I do find being underweight unattractive, as well. Doesn't mean I couldn't overlook a woman being more to one direction than I'd like, if I liked her otherwise, but I can't claim to be above valuing appearance--that, and being overweight/underweight is unhealthy in ways other than one's dating prospects.

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