LizzieLou

Unfortunately

... I'd been too dense to see the disaster when it was way back on the first date. Nope, I hadda march blindly on for a year and a half, shacking up and everything, before I could see clearly that the first date when she told me to "eat it bitch!" was a bad sign.

Sure she was making a joke about dinner in a restaurant, but there was just something in the tone I really shoulda recognized..... Hmmm.

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I usually either see the signs way in advance and don't date the woman to start with. Or, I'm so crazy about her I don't see any signs what so ever. No matter how many signs there are or who repeatedly points them out to me. I simply can't/won't see or hear them. ( You might know its really bad when a woman's own friends start warning you behind her back, but not me! I won't listen to it, if I'm in love that's all I need to know!)

After I get over the pain/anger/etc of the break-up, I'll look back & realize there not only where plenty of signs, there was a whole road map! I just couldn't/wouldn't see.

Whoever said love is blind, was correct, in my opinion.

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I'd say love makes you blind. I've ignored the signs twice now. :/

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Have you ever said anything that u meant to be as a joke and someone thought u meant it?

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I know from personal experience that love makes me blind. After (hopefully) learning the hard way, I now pay attention to the catten's input about people I date. This is not meant to sound trite or witty. She has saved my bacon more than once. The catten has nothing to gain by being dishonest, and she has been very reliable.

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Some psychopaths are very good about not leaving any signs for a long time, behaving very well, almost too good to be true. Then, use you, abuse you mentally once they know they have your attachment. Be careful out there, sometimes there are no signs from psychopaths.

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Just a little ladvice I make a list of rules. 10 things I wil not except. It's easier to hold yourself accountable for your choices. Instead of Wht others tell u. Don't break the rules no matter what let her know the rules upfront she don't like rules she need to go got to be strong good luck ; )

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On ‎2‎/‎3‎/‎2015 at 9:16 AM, CJ24kt said:

Just a little ladvice I make a list of rules. 10 things I wil not except. It's easier to hold yourself accountable for your choices. Instead of Wht others tell u. Don't break the rules no matter what let her know the rules upfront she don't like rules she need to go got to be strong good luck ; )

Best advice I've read all night. Since losing my wife of ten years, I've tried to get back into the dating scene (having no idea how to do that); and the result was that I repeatedly dated women that I had nothing in common with. I kept accepting dates because I didn't want to make anyone feel bad or be close-minded, and I regretted it every single time. I'm in my mid-thirties, I know what I want, and the onus is on me to be true to myself and honest with other people.

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On 11/27/2006 at 1:34 AM, LizzieLou said:

... I'd been too dense to see the disaster when it was way back on the first date. Nope, I hadda march blindly on for a year and a half, shacking up and everything, before I could see clearly that the first date when she told me to "eat it bitch!" was a bad sign.

Sure she was making a joke about dinner in a restaurant, but there was just something in the tone I really shoulda recognized..... Hmmm.

I've been in a similar situation with a guy. The very first guy I had ever been involved with on more than a friendship level. He seemed really genuine and hired me as a live in housekeeper. Things eventually turned romantic/sexual and I was completely blinded to all the warning signs. I didn't even recognize alot of the subsequent abuse as abuse until after I had gotten out and had time to reflect. 

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