I have just recently officially came to the conclusion that I want to be with a woman. I am out to some...waiting until I meet someone to be out to everyone. So needless to say I'm new to this scene and I'm horrible at it so far. I went to my first lesbian bar a few weeks ago and was a little nervous about it. I had a woman come up to me and tell me I was cute and it made me feel great ...and glad that I came. Long story short I got her number and pretty much blew up her phone and to this day have no idea what was wrong with me. I come across really aggressive ..almost like I'm trying to sell myself. I had a woman tell me I should be in sales because that's how strong my personality is. To top it off when I get a number the three day rule seems like eternity to me. I call too soon too often trying to make plans RIGHT AWAY and scare people off. I know what my problem is I just have no idea how to relax. I'm not sure if it's excitement that I'm finally taking steps towards being happy instead of lying to myself or what. I'm really not crazy , a stalker, or whatever the few women I've done this to think of me. I think I'm just anxious and unsure and with that I do stupid things. Any words of wisdom on how I can tone it down ?
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The three day rule is ridiculous. Basically, call her when you feel like you'd want to call her. There's nothing wrong with at the end of the conversation, or even in the middle, saying, "So, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?" However, blowing up her phone makes you look like a stalker. Call her once. If she doesn't answer, leave a message reminding her briefly who you are ("Hi, it's sweetwannabe from the bar last night"), leave your number, and keep it brief but friendly. If she doesn't call back by the next day, try once more (keep it light, "Hey. Didn't hear from you, thought I'd try once more). If you don't hear from her once again, well, then just assume it was for the best and move on.
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