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Mental Illnesses

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I think I know how that is. I don't like to be social all the time either - and when I am I don't always like being in the center of the activity. If you don't feel like being social there is nothing wrong with that, and maybe it would only take a change in scene for you to open up more. Or, perhaps you are introverted enough that your own company sates that need. Once again, nothing wrong with that.

The problem arises when a person slips into the extreme. Antisocial personality disorder, or sociopathy, is something that would need to be addressed and treated. That person would not be able to hold onto any lengthy relationship. There would be a total disregard for anyone other than himself or herself - that would be a deal-breaker for most people.

People who feel you have a mental disorder based on a lack of socialization need to leave you alone and realize it's live and let live.


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The trouble with folks with antisocial personality d/o, is that they do not have a problem with their behavior-everyone else does. You are most correct about extremes. All thing in moderation are good, including moderation. I try not to take myself too seriously, even though it does get on people's nerves at times. After all, I am the one who lets people know when I am at work by posting a sign that reads "Asshole On Duty." Be that as it may, no, I do not aspire to prove the sign correct.


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Sounds like your sense of humor is similar to mine then :)


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View PostChazz44, on 31 January 2010 - 04:27 PM, said:

People who have a managed "mental illness" don't worry me. It's the ones who have an unmanaged one, or who are in denial about it, do.

The people who worry me the most, are the ones who can live in this world, as it is, and have no problems at all. 8)

Chazz - (A little bit crazy and pleased about it.)
Well, there are people who have mental illness, such as disorders in the brain's wiring, like autism or aspergers that can't be "managed," only acknowledged and recognized.
but yeah, people who "have no problems" have the biggest problem of all; because they face no challenges or growth to define their existence and improve themselves with, let alone reflect upon over wine, beer, or tea with someone. What's more, then you can't share in overcoming a problem or a challenge with someone who has it in common. *yawn*


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I have a mental disorder too and I have been told that I can be a little bit socially awkward/anti-social and quite shy. I only suffer with clinical depression which is not as bad as other people, but I can understand why people would think of it as a deal breaker in a relationship. I personally don't mind if someone has a mental disorder as I would be more considerate as I would kind of know what they are going through. I have not put this on my personal status, but I would never hide the fact either because if they found out later on into the relationship then they obviously would think our relationship was based on a lie.
"I am good but not an angel. I do sin but I'm not the devil. I am pretty but not beautiful. I have friends but I'm not the peacemaker. I am a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love."
Marilyn Monroe


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Great topic and an important one to bring into the open. I have a physical and psychological different ability. Luckily, when I was younger, my natural athletic ability helped build a core ego self that had some inner strength. Life happens and along the way I acquired an Anxiety Response and my Depression manifested more acutely as I experienced more of life. We are in a society where perfection is the ideal. My body is no longer capable of doing what it once was able to do when I competed in high school and college sports. So, there is this group of women that will not be interested in a relationship with me because I may not be able to hike the Great Wall of China,mountain bike, sky dive, ride horses or whatever with them.
I am, also, aware there will be a group of women that will not be interested in a relationship with me when I inform them of my psychological challenges. Then, I tell them I'm an opinionated Progressive/Atheist and the pool of women gets smaller. Luckily, I have intelligence and a sense of humor. I monitor my moods, feel my feelings, take my meds and continue to search. All I can do is Reframe peoples labels and dialogue and do the best I can on any given day to face the challenges in my life.


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View Postashleigh, on 27 February 2011 - 10:56 PM, said:

It is not so much as having a disorder as it is a matter of just dispplaying a range of symptoms. Those of us who get/got caught just happened to have enough signs/symptoms to qualify as a disorder or diagnosis. There are things that we do that can make us more susceptible to onset of mental illness, such as going long periods without adequate sleep. This is one of the reasons that patients in a stabilization unit are generally given meds to encourage sleep. Basically, this serves as a rule out test. By using this example, I am not saying that nature does not predispose some of us to certain diagnoses. Though, it may be in our genes, it is not a guarantee that we will also have a mental illness. Like everything else in life, it depends on a combination of things and how we are able or unable to cope with events. Remeber, you don't see motorcycles parked in front of psychiatrist offices.

In fact, Ashleigh, I ride a motorcycle and have parked it in front of a psychiatric treatment facility, numerous times, so I'm unsure of the meaning behind your motorcycles quote, who said it, and what it applies to. Care to clarify for the edification of one of us motorcycle riders? Thanks much. Also to weigh in on the thread, I tend not to date folks with diagnosable mental illness. My previous experiences have been pretty negative, and everytime I go against my gut to give someone "a chance" it turns out for the worst, generally. I grew up with a bipolar mother, have worked in various para-professional capacities with the population, and have found that my ability to cope with the DSM-level of mental health is lower when it is in a personal relationship type of situation. I feel like it's not fair to say "yeah, no problem, come on in" when I know the triggers from my mother and various workplaces are going to go right to work. I'm stable, haven't been hit with a bad gene (yet) and I'm grateful to be so, but I have found that I'm stable for ME, I can't carry it for two, and even when it starts out well, there's always the shift to "well, you can handle it, so here, take my crazy and keep me safe" and you know what? I just don't want to. I hate to say it, and I respect anyone who is dealing with diagnosis and treatment, but I am much better as your supportive and funny friend than as your girlfriend, and there's someone out there who WILL be the right girl for you, it's just not me. It took me a long time to stop feeling guilty about having this deal breaker, but much introspection and many failed tries later, I just think it's a fair and honest way to present MY reality.


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the quote about motorcycles is from a t-shirt, reinforced by personal experience. no matter how i was feeling, everything, and i mean everything, always felt better on a motorcycle. my deepest depression could never stand up to a motorcycle trip.

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