illuminosity

Ever have the feeling that you'll spend the rest of your life alone?

So.... this neighbor girl of mine is always nice to me, but I don't think she wants anything more. I just don't get that feeling from her.

It would have been so awesome had it worked out. 

I like another girl too, but she lives two countries away and is hung up on another chick.

Ever have the feeling that you'll spend the rest of your life alone and never have sex again? (I mean, sex with another person)

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Sorry to hear that. I hope all works out well!

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Greetings from Portland, OR. <3

I feel your pain!! It's not easy for me either……hence the "single" status. Just be patient………you haven't met the right one yet. I tell myself that every day. 

~Julia

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Its so hard to meet a women who is truly gay where I live and then you end up catching feelings for the wrong ones all the time.it truly blows

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This is my fear as well.Its not easy to even find gay people locally let alone ones who are girlfriend material.Whenever I am in between relationships (like now) I always wonder if I'll ever find anyone again

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I just broke with my gf. Besides all the hurt, I wonder, now what am I going to for sex??? Lol...gotta laugh.... but seriously... sex!!! 

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What is so bad about being alone?? If you are meant to be with someone, it will happen in time, you just have to be patient, but if you prefer to be alone, like myself, then you have no problem with being by yourself. Peace.

 

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I'm a late bloomer--didn't come out to myself until I was 31--and now I'm 38 and while I haven't actively tried to date because I've still been getting my mental health shit together, I really feel this. It doesn't help that my best friend-slash-roomate just got involved with someone, and I'm just... so jealous of what they have. I worry that I don't even know how to feel that way about someone anymore.

I'm trying to tell myself that it'll happen in time, though, and as long as I go out and do my usual stuff (which is... mostly sitting in coffee shops and going to conventions and playing WoW lately, TBH) I'll meet someone who I can do those things with, who I can really click with. It's not easy, but I'm trying to hold on to hope.

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I feel you girl. It's hard being alone especially when it's been for years. Not fun at all, but know that you have friends to keep you sane.

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I've been single for a little over 5 years now. I've been on exactly one date in those 5 years. Yeah, I kind of think I'll end up alone.

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I have the same fear-that I'm going to be alone from now on. I'm generally okay with being single, because I like to think happiness is a choice despite circumstances; however, there are days when it feels a little overwhelming. My fear is twofold. One, I live in a small, rural town. I was also late figuring out my sexuality, so I don't even know how to go about meeting a woman around here. Two, I've also been a commitment-phobe. I'm notorious for ditching relationships that look like they should be perfect for me on the outside. I have no clue if that will be different when I'm with a woman. I hope so. Most days I think that's probably the case. However, there are times that I worry I'm just not capable of feeling that much or that strongly. It's a lonely feeling. For now, I got a dog and am trying to not freak out over that commitment. Lol. Seriously, though, I guess time will tell as far as relationships go.

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I do think that sometimes. Like am I ever gonna be enough for someone?

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If it's left up to me, I'll definitely stay single. After surviving an unbelievingly horrific relationship (it'd make a hell of a movie but I doubt anyone would believe what actually happened), I just don't actually make any attempts to meet women any more. I don't go to gay pubs (about the only place to meet here), there are rarely any public events other than Pride....so there you go. Actually, a woman trying to start a lesbian group in the area was featured in the newspaper, recently. The downside is that I don't want to risk ever running into my ex, so I'm basically shut out of that one avenue. I'd placed myself on a site online stating "looking for friends only" & ended up meeting with women who obviously saw that as a "come-on"- lol. When it was clear I was looking for someone to go for lunch, coffee, outings, etc with, they just never returned. A shame, as things might've turned into more (never know)-- but they had their own schedule in mind.

So, unless fate plants a wonderful women where I can't help meeting her, I'm on the shelf permanently, I suppose. And, things could be worse-- I see plenty of miserable couples out there who stay together out of fear of loneliness or guilt/duty... This sums it up, nicely:

 

The One.png

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For a variety of reasons, I think the odds are definitely against me to find someone. In general, I think there are a lot of great, and even preferable, things about being single. At the same time, I am a romantic and really do want to find true love and someone to spend my life with. Aside from that, though, the thing that really scares me is I'm close to my parents and they're 70-ish. I think more and more about their passing away. I have sisters, but I'm not close to them. I also don't have any good friends (I have friends, but none of us live in the same part of the country, even, since graduating). So, I worry about *really* being alone when my parents pass, and that's when I think I'd feel really miserable and truly alone.

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I definitely feel like I'll end up being alone for the rest of my life. I've been single for almost 7 years and at first, it was great getting to know myself and be independent... but since moving back to Jamaica, I've been feeling like I've been ready to date. So last year I joined some sites... and I met someone in November who likes me but unfortunately (for me), she is still in love with her ex. Then this month, I tried another site... and met someone who I totally connect with on some other world level... but she is in a serious relationship. Sigh. So... I found this site and I am hoping for some luck in finding someone for me. If not, then I will truly believe that I am meant to be single for the rest of my life. 

Sending lots of hugs to everyone who feels this way... *hugs* 

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I definitely understand where you're coming from. I will say though that as hard as it can be sometimes I'm still hopeful that I will meet someone that's just right for me. I hope the same for you. Stay positive and patient hun! :) 

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Ren85 said:

For a variety of reasons, I think the odds are definitely against me to find someone. In general, I think there are a lot of great, and even preferable, things about being single. At the same time, I am a romantic and really do want to find true love and someone to spend my life with. Aside from that, though, the thing that really scares me is I'm close to my parents and they're 70-ish. I think more and more about their passing away. I have sisters, but I'm not close to them. I also don't have any good friends (I have friends, but none of us live in the same part of the country, even, since graduating). So, I worry about *really* being alone when my parents pass, and that's when I think I'd feel really miserable and truly alone.

I completely understand about being alone after your parents are gone. I have been my parents' caregiver for the last 4 years. It's been really rough because I just want to be loved by a woman and cares for me and maybe one day doesn't mind my service dog! :) Being from a small town doesn't help either.

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