Tori_bird

8 Ways To Spot Emotional Manipulation.

(Small personal anecdote warning)

I was in a shitty relationship for 3 years. I spent 3 years of my life with a rotten lying manipulative brat, because I was too nice and didn't know what was happening to me while we were together. If I had seen this and read it, I could have avoided the pain and anger and just all around bad stuff she had stuffed into my life. Because this is stuff you don't hear about until you're older and have been kicked in the "balls" a half dozen times by crappy people.

Please read this and learn to see the tricks in others, protect your selves and others. Also, many people do this kind of thing themselves without even realizing it... you don't have to be an outright bad person to do mean things. So you should stop and get a little scared and wonder if you do this too. It's better than just saying "Naaah! I don't do that." when you could be hurting someone with poor behavior.

(I'm aware that this came off of Tumblr, but these are all good things to pay attention to that I have seen in real life countless times with me and friends, and there's a surplus of people out there who are either horribly guilty of this or horribly ignorant of it happening. So here's some education.)

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"1. There is no use in trying to be honest with an emotional manipulator. You make a statement and it will be turned around. Example: I am really angry that you forgot my birthday. Response - “It makes me feel sad that you would think I would forget your birthday, I should have told you of the great personal stress I am facing at the moment - but you see I didn’t want to trouble you. You are right I should have put all this pain (don’t be surprised to see real tears at this point) aside and focused on your birthday. Sorry.” Even as you are hearing the words you get the creeped out sensation that they really do NOT mean they are sorry at all - but since they’ve said the words you’re pretty much left with nothing more to say. . . . "

[ original source is this blog here: http://angelinaherre...ost/19212036655 ]

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Thanks for sharing this information it was very helpful. Made me realize how I was being manipulated. 

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I'm pretty immune to emotional manipulation because my philosophy is life is too short to spend a significant amount of time with those who make me feel bad. My first move is to ditch a person who tends to bring negativity into my world; I really don't need anyone that much.

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I am finding folks who quickly want to email or talk on the phone and while I am who I say I am in my profile, it takes me some time to get to know someone and step things up a notch.  Perhaps it is O.K. to let these folks go by if they cannot respect my needs for self care.  thanks for info.

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"There is no use in trying to be honest with an emotional manipulator. You make a statement and it will be turned around." Sounds like one of my ex-girlfriends........

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