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Does Assertiveness = Butch

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I would like to consider myself a lady, but more often than not i come off as assertive or perhaps even aggressive. well that is what i have been told. I am as soft and gentle as they come, but i will admit that i am quite forward. i do not see a point in beating around any bushes. i am to the point and direct. my appearance as all woman but since i am assertive does that mean im a Butch????? i am perplexed...... does it matter that i look girly but have a mouth like a sailor sometimes and that if i want to hook up with a woman i tell her my intentions up front... does that make me bad. i do not like to morph my personalityso i can fit into a narrow category of what i should be expected to act like... what is a girl to do....... :huh:


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We're in the same boat. Anyone have an answer?

@Scissor_Sista on-a-mountain-she-sits.tumblr.com

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This is a shorter answer than this topic probably deserves, but anyone that feels that femme/feminine/womanly/woman/lady/girlish/ladylike can't possibly ALSO = forward/aggressive/assertive/direct/to the point . . . is a misogynist.

Think about it.

If you DON'T really think that, you must then logically imagine that any aspect of femininity means the person expressing that shouldn't ask for what they want in the world. And shouldn't try to do what they reasonably can to get it.

How could that NOT be misogynist?

Masculine persons should pursue their goals in whatever respect, but feminine persons should not?

No one that isn't a woman/femme hater would buy into that.

If you've found someone that is that hateful toward femininity, I would give them a pass. No matter what they think about you otherwise.


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no. butch/femme refers to physicality (and sometimes some level of gender identity), not personality traits. there's nothing about lipstick and dangly earrings that means you have to be demure; and pencil skirts are not for damsels. strong femmes are swoonworthy, so wear it with pride.

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