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CattSapphire

I Honestly Don't Know What To Do.

Hello. I am Cat. I have always been a woman but.. not sure if I have ever felt "right". I have always thought of men to be "right" and such but pretty much anything gay, straight, lesbian, anything works for me, even when I have been in a relationship. I don't really identify myself as a woman but almost get angry when people confuse me for a man. I recently cut my hair to donate to cancer and have gotten a lot of looks. Although I don't really enjoy my hair short, it has given me a lot to think about. Is it wrong to want a man but also want to be a man? My family is sort of accepting in this regard, but I doubt they would believe me or talk me out of it if I wanted to change. I'm not even sure how to go about it in Canada. I've been thinking deep but I think your opinions would help. Am I gay stuck in a woman's body, or straight? I have had many dreams where I was a man and liked them but in the society we live in I'm pretty terrified of these thoughts. I have been getting drunk a lot recently because of this. I have no one to talk to but the internet. What I think I might like is a trans woman to man but I can't be sure. I think a woman that is now a man would understand what I feel better? Anyway, thanks for any input. I am so confused.

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Possibly you're just genderfluid. It's normal to question your gender identity at times regardless of what people would have you think. I think you already have an idea of what you are but are just scared which is understandable. Keep your head up.

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Very early on in my gender transition, I found a local transgender support group. I have been going there for over a year and a half, and I think I've missed 2-3 meetings in that time. They have been absolutely invaluable in my journey. I've made friendships, found camaraderie, and exploded the limits of what I thought about gender, race, and identity. Attending these weekly support group meetings has been massively affirming for me.

I found a list of support groups in your area: www.gendermosaic.com/ontario-support-groups/. Maybe you can find one that sounds like a good fit for you? 

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