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CattSapphire

I Honestly Don't Know What To Do.

Hello. I am Cat. I have always been a woman but.. not sure if I have ever felt "right". I have always thought of men to be "right" and such but pretty much anything gay, straight, lesbian, anything works for me, even when I have been in a relationship. I don't really identify myself as a woman but almost get angry when people confuse me for a man. I recently cut my hair to donate to cancer and have gotten a lot of looks. Although I don't really enjoy my hair short, it has given me a lot to think about. Is it wrong to want a man but also want to be a man? My family is sort of accepting in this regard, but I doubt they would believe me or talk me out of it if I wanted to change. I'm not even sure how to go about it in Canada. I've been thinking deep but I think your opinions would help. Am I gay stuck in a woman's body, or straight? I have had many dreams where I was a man and liked them but in the society we live in I'm pretty terrified of these thoughts. I have been getting drunk a lot recently because of this. I have no one to talk to but the internet. What I think I might like is a trans woman to man but I can't be sure. I think a woman that is now a man would understand what I feel better? Anyway, thanks for any input. I am so confused.

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Possibly you're just genderfluid. It's normal to question your gender identity at times regardless of what people would have you think. I think you already have an idea of what you are but are just scared which is understandable. Keep your head up.

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Very early on in my gender transition, I found a local transgender support group. I have been going there for over a year and a half, and I think I've missed 2-3 meetings in that time. They have been absolutely invaluable in my journey. I've made friendships, found camaraderie, and exploded the limits of what I thought about gender, race, and identity. Attending these weekly support group meetings has been massively affirming for me.

I found a list of support groups in your area: www.gendermosaic.com/ontario-support-groups/. Maybe you can find one that sounds like a good fit for you? 

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Just so you know transitioning from female to male is pretty straight forward and simple. Unlike male to female transition, it's pretty easy. 

But you have to decide if that is truely the life you want, as you can't undo the effects of hormones. 

My advice is to talk to a councilor about it. It might help keep you from making any mistakes.

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CattSapphire said:

Hello. I am Cat. I have always been a woman but.. not sure if I have ever felt "right". I have always thought of men to be "right" and such but pretty much anything gay, straight, lesbian, anything works for me, even when I have been in a relationship. I don't really identify myself as a woman but almost get angry when people confuse me for a man. I recently cut my hair to donate to cancer and have gotten a lot of looks. Although I don't really enjoy my hair short, it has given me a lot to think about. Is it wrong to want a man but also want to be a man? My family is sort of accepting in this regard, but I doubt they would believe me or talk me out of it if I wanted to change. I'm not even sure how to go about it in Canada. I've been thinking deep but I think your opinions would help. Am I gay stuck in a woman's body, or straight? I have had many dreams where I was a man and liked them but in the society we live in I'm pretty terrified of these thoughts. I have been getting drunk a lot recently because of this. I have no one to talk to but the internet. What I think I might like is a trans woman to man but I can't be sure. I think a woman that is now a man would understand what I feel better? Anyway, thanks for any input. I am so confused.

Hi Cat,

I just wanted to check in with you. Have you found any support groups or counseling in your area? Are you feeling better about gender fluidity? I hope so. God Bless.

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